10 Reasons Why I’m Going to Start Dating White Men

25 Jul
I'm get one too, Sanaa!!!

I’ma get me one, too.

So, while on the Twitters today (you can find me at @CeeNCrumpets), there was an article floating around written by one of “Black Twitter’s Elite Idiots”. Some guy name Ice wrote an article entitled “10 Reasons Black Guys Prefer White Girls”. I read. I shook my head. I realized how idiotic it all sounded. Then, I started thinking “This is just HIS opinion, this isn’t ALL black males, right????”

A glimpse of my timeline showed me, sadly, there are other guys out here who feel this way. And I by no means am knocking ANYONE’S dating preference. But I’m saddened by the amount of sheepish black men who subscribe to this same thought process. So instead of me filling up your timeline with my thought, I took it to the blog. Here we go!

10 Reasons I’m going to start dating White men:

10. White guys LOVE my hair. Whether it’s weaved, pressed or naturally twisted, I’ve ALWAYS received compliments from the men of Caucasia. They touch it (with permission), play in it, even had one help me twist it. Also, they understand that while we don’t often get our hair wet, we don’t smell like wet dog when we do.

9. White men listen. I don’t have to tell Tom more than once what I need him to do. I’m STILL asking Dayquan to get his brush and du rag out my car,

8. White guys are family friendly. Your Grandmother isn’t worried that Trent is going to steal her Sterling Silver gravy boat at Thanksgiving. He’s also bringing over a bottle of wine for Auntie Tamika to add to the punch.

7. White men aren’t bothered by my lack of restrictions in the bedroom. I believe that sex should be more than a nut. It is a bonding experience designed for pleasure and growth. But suggesting any position in the bedroom to a Black man leads to accusations of unfaithfulness and them questioning whether they have entered a relationship with a hoe. White guy? “You said you want a finger in your ass, honey?? Left hand or right?”

6. White men aren’t trying to be music A&R on Twitter. Some of my Black brothers spend COUNTLESS hours on Twitter, dissecting mixtapes, albums, blogging, but have never said anything like “hard day in the office” or “my manager gets on my nerves”. You’re not all producers or tastemakers. Most white men have goals, and will let you know of those goals within the first 30 minutes of your conversation. Check out white twitter during 9-5…CRICKETS, People!!!!

5. White men have no problem giving their women gifts. I’ve known this white dude for 4 days, and managed to get a bouquet of exotic flowers, an edible arrangement and a $200 date. A Black guy will buy you lingerie for Christmas and get mad when you’re not excited. I’m not saying that material things are important, but it’s MANY Black men out here that won’t loan their “Woman” $20 til her next payday because it’s be deemed as “tricking”.

4. White men act like they have some good gotdamn sense. I do not constantly have to yell at Rob for coming home late because Rob respects me and is home in bed by 1. I don’t have to nag Rob because he handles his business without me reminding him of his responsibilities. I don’t go through Rob’s phone or email because he’s never given me any reason to suspect something fishy may be going on. I also don’t have to worry about Rob calling me 5453 times in a row because I didn’t respond to his text quickly enough. Rob doesn’t accuse me of sleeping with every male that I say “Hi” to. Rob doesn’t ride past my house to make sure no other cars are there, either.

3. White men love to take care of their women. You need your car washed, oil changed? Those gutters clean enough? How’s that new chandelier Joe installed?

2. White men in the bedroom. Ever got some head from a suburban boy with full lips and an appetite for days??? None of that cute shit, them boys get DOWN! From the roota to the toota!! And he’s not done until you are.

And Finally…the TOP REASON…

1. White men just seem to have it together. I mean, look at Robin Thicke, Chris Noth, Robert DeNiro, Justin Chamber, Roger Ebert and David Bowie. Hell, Even Brad Pitt!!!!!! What do all these powerful, rich, famous, melanin challenged men ALL have in common??? They’ve all either dated or are MARRIED to BLACK WOMEN. 

102 Responses to “10 Reasons Why I’m Going to Start Dating White Men”

  1. Whitney G (@whitgam912) February 13, 2013 at 4:40 pm #

    This is joooookes!!!!!!!! Especially “which hand left or right!” There are definitely Men of all color who cheat, lie, have police records and so on, but we must admit some stereotypes about EVERY race is sad, may anger us, and all the above, but true. That is where the problem lies….when negative stereotypes are actually true and those habits and mentalities are passed on…it indeed divides.

  2. Shalane February 28, 2013 at 5:47 am #

    I agree with you 100% I love white men. The part about them going down is true I don’t know one white guy that don’t go down. Every white guy I have known likes to go down. Have had better relationships with white guys then black guys.

  3. Shalane February 28, 2013 at 5:53 am #

    White guys like black women because we take control we let them know where we stand. Black guys don’t like it when we show them where we stand they like to walk all over us.

  4. Ryan April 4, 2013 at 7:56 am #

    Im a 22 year old black woman. I may be young but this blog spoke volumes and i too am about to.jump on the bandwagon and start dating rob…

  5. Anonymous June 24, 2013 at 1:00 am #

    You are right about so many of these. I have had a white bf and a white friend who liked me. I am 23 y/o. My white bf was incredibly sexual,and sexually liberated and he loved every litle nasty thing about me. He liked my hair, he was a good listener….you get a lot out of a guy, white or black, when he likes you….only thing is, white guys are trained to treat their women better. They’re raised to treat you with respect. Good article!#10, 9, 6, 3, and 1 are reallytrue.

  6. ABdo July 25, 2013 at 9:28 am #

    It just seems like you never met the right black Man.

    • Cee September 6, 2013 at 6:26 pm #

      I ACTUALLY have. We’ve been dating for a few years now. Thanks for your concern!

  7. Adrian August 12, 2013 at 3:18 am #

    So basically you stereotyped all black men into one group and demonized all of us. You made generalizations and comments to make us seem as though we are not worth dating in general. In addition to this you claim that another race of man is better than black men because of a one woman’s experience which cannot be expected to follow suite in all instances. Honestly any woman who follows this and believes in this falls under the truest definition of a racist. Any black woman who would denounce her father, brothers, and sons as unworthy of a black woman’s love because of her experiences with other black men and claim that white men are better fall under the prime definition an Uncle Tom. This article is disgusting and ignorant. If you want to date outside your race then by all means go ahead. But to make piss poor generalizations and sorry ass comments is just shameful. You needed approval to feel better about dating outside your race that is why you made this article and you are bitter to all black men for the mistakes of the ones YOU chose. God bless you my dear because if it were my choice you would go straight to hell.

    • Cee September 6, 2013 at 6:25 pm #

      What I did was write a satirical blog that got people thinking, laughing and clearly upset. Thanks!

    • Dani September 7, 2013 at 4:10 am #

      So let me get this straight..your saying that the author deserves to go to hell because of her opinions? Lmaoooo you black men are such hypocrites!!!!! You call her an uncle tom but what about all those black men who sit on Youtube, Twitter, Facebook, etc and disrespect black women to no end. Saying things like how dark skin black women are ugly, unattractive, unwanted, ghetto, ratchet, nasty, etc, etc??? What about the rappers who call black women bitches and hoes????!!!! You ever heard of a white man who made a song dissing white women and calling them those nasty names? No! Because black men are the ONLY race of men who degrade their women! And none of these black men ever say “some” black women they generalize all of us, so isn’t that the exact same thing? Why the fuck don’t you check those niggas!! Tell them to stop dissing the ONLY women who have had their backs from the start, who would R.O.D for them, who will love them, protect them, provide for them, etc although black men have made no effort in showing black women that they are worthy of any of that. BLACK MEN ARE DISGUSTING AND IGNORANT!!! If you want black women to change their opininons of black men, start telling these WHACK UNEDUCATED LOSERS TO GET THEIR ACTS TOGETHER AND STOP ATTACKING BLACK WOMEN!!! And yes, white men are better than black men you wanna know why? White men take care of, respect, protect, honor and LOVE their women! They provide a stable home for their families, secure their families financially, send their children to the best schools, own land, homes, stocks, businesses,investsments etc! And another thing white men don’t go around shooting eah other over bullshit and wanting to commit genocide against his own people. Black men have destroyed the black community with their violence, diseases, lack of support and leadership, lack of education, etc and statistics shows it! Yes, there are black men who are qualified but lets be honest theres not that many black men who are educated, respectable and family oriented. MOST black men are just losers and black women are frustrated and have every right to be. I don’t really care what you have to say because I know you will find ever reason in the book to justify black men’s actions, while putting down black women. Your not a real man if you can’t see how fucked up black men are! Black men are a failure to their gender and race end of story. We black women have a right to choose the white men. And its funny how whenever you black men feel threatened you pull out that “how can you say that about your father, brother, ucles, etc” like shut the hell up! When black men diss black women aren’t they dissing their mothers, sisters, aunts, etc?? But you black men never seem to bring that up because your all hypocrites! I don’t like black men and as far as I’m concerned you can all go to hell!!!

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Top 10 Reasons I Love Black Men | The Cocoa Butter Chronicles - July 28, 2012

    [...] 10 Reasons Black Guys Prefer White Girls” then @WetAsTheCee did a response post titled “Ten Reasons I’m Going To Start Dating White Men”. And you know black twitter went wild. It’s funny because “DC” and I had a [...]

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